UK Home Secretary speaks at the Annual Conference of the Legalise Cannabis Alliance in Stoke On Trent, 15 September 2007

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Hello

I’m Jaqui Spliff, I’m your new Home Secretary

I am very pleased to be able to address your conference today.

The government is carrying out a public consultation on drugs,
and we are developing a totally new drugs policy.

The simple message of this new policy is:

“ Don’t take drugs.”

If you have read my introduction to the Government consultation document, you will know my views.

Illegal drugs cause damage and ruin to individuals, families and communities. And the most vulnerable among us are often the hardest hit.

For individuals, drug misuse means wasted potential, broken relationships and, for some, a life of crime .

This applies particularly to cannabis or ‘Skunk’ as we now call it; as it causes psychotic episodes and loss of memory.

Look at my own case, I took drugs, and now I am having to barefacedly trot out all the lies and untruths which represent a statement of government policy.

Then look at the case of the last Home Secretary, John Reid, The police searched his house and found drugs under the bed, and he
could not remember how they got there .

Then there was the previous Home Secretary Charles Clarke,
He took drugs; He spent a year as Home Secretary trying to get cannabis put back into class B and he forgot to notice that a whole horde of foreign criminals had been released from prison – by mistake.

Then there is the tragic case of David Cameron, He took drugs and dealt in drugs while he was at school at Eaton. He has ended up as the leader of the Tory Party.

He is suffering under the psychotic illusion that he is going to be the next prime minister. He rides his bicycle to work every day amid the fumes and danger of the London traffic He is followed by a fleet of cars carrying his documents, his computers and his telephones, all accompanied by a police motorcycle escort .

Understandably senior Conservative party officials are alarmed at this as an example of the future Conservative lifestyle and are demanding the reinstatement of Margaret Thatcher as the party leader,

And in America too there are dire examples of how drugs have ruined peoples lives. Take the example of former President Bill Clinton,
He took drugs; and he couldn’t remember whether he had inhaled or not, but the thinks perhaps he probably didn’t. Also he couldn’t remember whether he had had sexual relations with Monica Lewinsky or not, but again he thought that most likely he hadn’t.

Let us look at the current President George W. Bush – He took drugs.
He invaded and occupied Iraq, and then he couldn’t remember why he had invaded in the first place, but he thought it might have been something to do with weapons of mass destruction which they didn’t have.

The President is currently on a foreign tour. On TV news this morning there was clear evidence that he could not remember which country he was in, what organisation he was addressing, or which door he had just walked through.

So you can see how taking drugs has definitely brought ruin into these peoples lives and badly effected their memories.

I would like to get back to talking about the new drugs government policy .

A central part of this is what we call the the Public service agreement or the PSA. This is set up to ensure that that you the taxpayer gets good value for your money.

The PSA 3 is concerned with law and order and the aim is to lower the cost of bringing offenders to justice by 3% next year . and to raise the number of offenders brought to justice to 1.5million in 2008. In order to achieve these goals we have decided to reclassify cannabis as a class B drug .

There are four million cannabis users in Britain and both the police and the prison service agree that cannabis criminals are far the best type of criminals to to have.

They are not threatening or violent, they are easily intimidated and when in custody are generally docile and easily controlled. Also when the are arrested and drugs are found in their possession they have no defence in law, which cuts down the court costs considerably.

This will enable us to reach our targets of reducing the costs and increasing the number of convictions.

The money saved however will be put to good use. Certain dealers will be ‘flagged’. This means they will not be prosecuted but will be paid a fee for name of every client that they pass on to the police.

This means that if the police will not have to waste valuable police time looking for drugs offenders. They will know exactly where to find you.

On account of the recent rise in gun crime, and since being a flagged dealer and informer has some occupational risks, the police will allow them a discount on the purchase of bullet proof vests.

The war on drugs has been stepped in Afghanistan and many of our brave soldiers have sacrificed their lives in the war on drugs over there.

Last year there was a record opium poppy harvest and this year it has increased over that by another 50%. So it is interesting to note that in one area of the drugs war targets have been exceeded.

You will remember the good work we did last year in making psylocybin mushrooms a class a drug.

This now means that if these are found growing on a persons property then they can be put in prison for 20 years, and it is quite possible that they are growing there already

I hope this all put your minds at rest and gives you reassurance over the new drugs policy

and reminding you that the simple message is:

Don’t take drugs.

Thank you

J. S.

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